J-lo and Mark Anthony Divorce......

Jennifer Lopez and Mark Anthony split after a 7 yr. marriage.  Boo hoo.  Do you know how their careers have taken off since then?  Both have launched

their own line of clothing. J-lo is doing foreign car commercials. Mark Anthony has never been more popular.......Now, if you don't think this was a

publicity stunt, think again. Mark my words with J-lo, they will get back together. They are a smart couple, but puhleeze......I feel a crying attack coming on....it's so sad. 

Dating and Cancer

Many people assume we are in relationships when we get cancer. That's not true. It's just that there aren't too many forums or blogs that deal with cancer and being single. I was single when I was diagnosed, when I had surgery, when I recovered. Not only was I single. I was gay and single. I still am gay and single. The difference is I am in remission. Cancer is insidious. It left me with a sense of dying. My healthy self did die but my healthy side refused to. I know we all fight and some lose. I don't think we want to but sometimes cancer is too pervasive. Too destructive for any surgery or treatment to stop it. So what's my point? My point is that I feel I am very lucky and blessed. I try to remember that everyday. I try to be aware of it. I try not to be depressed over small things. I try to remember what's important in life. It's not money or possessions. It's family, friends, and I'd like to say a relationship. I keep looking and keep myself open to the idea of it. I try not to let cancer define me and insist that I define who I am.  You can too. Remember that. I'm trying to.

On Eagle's Wings

My dear cousin Rodney died yesterday after a battle with cancer. Fly quickly my friend. We will miss you. In his honor, I think of him being raised up, no longer in pain, On Eagle's Wings.

Kitchensink

When I think of a kitchen sink, I think of something like the one above. Except, I don't wash my hands in the kitchen sink. Silly me, I use it for dirty dishes or peeling fruit or vegetables. I'm sure you want to know where I wash my hands. Hold on. Hold on.  There is a point here.

The Kitchensink I discovered is a very small coffee house which is only a block away from me. It is perfect for writing. Not many people know about it. The staff is uber friendly and willing to help you with anything. They even bring your coffee to your table. Of course, there is the chalkboard for continuous poetry. They also provide spoons to be green and you bus your dishes back when you're done. So far, I've met Danielle and Jacob who work there. Yesterday, I had a melt down trying to figure out how to use their wi-fi. Today, I lost my work twice and ran up to two different people in the middle of their masterpieces, asking, "Do you know how I can get my work back? I lost it. I need your help." I must have looked frightful because the woman immediately said, "I don't know anything about computers." Next I approached, a theatre person, working on a script. He was wearing a gold bling music note on his argyle sweater. When he understood what I was asking he said, "You probably lost it."  Just like that, "You probably lost it."  Do you how awful it is to hear those four words, "You probably lost it."  I only spent 2 hours writing it......2 hours.  So then I started over.  I had almost restored all of it, and ......are you ready?  I lost it again.  When I tried to save it, it disappeared.  Just disappeared. Poof. Gone. Lost. Third time is a charm.  "Attention to detail," became my mantra.  I did it. I saved it. It's there. Hoorah. This probably sounds ridiculous to all you computer people who talk, text, and write at the same time.  That's not me. I can't drink coffee and write at the same time.  Well, there, I feel so much better now. I think venting is very important in preventing prostate cancer.I know.I know. It's a big reach, but I haven't used that one in awhile. ( Ha)

9/11

This has been a sad and reflective day for me as I'm sure it has been for many of you. It is one of those days where you'll never forget where you were when it happened. I was talking to a window salesman in the living room of my condo. But, to think on that day nearly 3,000 people lost their lives is still incomprehensible to me. My heart goes out to all families who lost someone that day. Although I didn't, I feel as if I had. Somehow that event changed all of us. An innocence of protection was lost. A sense of wariness began. I pray it never happens again and hope someday, one day, there will be peace throughout the world. 

Prostate Talk

I've made my first animated movie, Prostate Talk, on Youtube . Take and look. Hope you like it.

Doctor, Doctor, Mr. M.D....

I remembered the lyrics to this song but forgot the group and title. It's "Good Lovin'" by the Young Rascals, l966. (God bless Google) Stick with me. I have a point here. I've been talking to many patients who were misled by their doctors. This is especially true when it comes to prostate cancer. In another post, on Honesty, I gave the doctors a break but this time I'm not. Doctors are uncomfortable dealing with sexuality, but they are very comfortable saying,"Bend Over." Hmm.

A general answer is, "80 to 90% of my patients return to full sexual functioning within a year." I don't know where they get their statistics but this isn't true. Check out cancer forums, especially PCAI.  Doctors are in business. They make more money doing surgery. Therefore, they recommend prostate removal. I opted for surgery because I didn't have the patience for "watchful waiting." After surgery,many doctors recommend vacuums, extenders, and injections for erections. None allow for sexual spontaneity. The doctor's final recommendation is a penile implant, which is sensual for both parties. The majority of men give it a  thumbs up.  (Breathe, Ken) My point is that there are many recommendations before we get to the most successful one, a penile implant. Thanks for reading. I feel so much better now.